#199 How to Get Your Horse to Respond to You

There’s a moment that’ll humble even the most seasoned rider: you pick up your reins, ask for something simple, and your horse answers… but not quite the way you meant. Delayed. Sticky. Bracey. And suddenly the ride turns into a quiet tug-of-war where nobody feels heard.

In this episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on a truth that’s both uncomfortable and freeing: most “unresponsive horse” problems aren’t really about your horse at all. They’re about communication happening inside a nervous system storm. We’re diving into how your body broadcasts signals louder than your aids, why responsiveness starts with regulation, and the simple shifts that turn frustration into clarity so your horse can actually understand you.

If you or someone you know has benefited from this episode, be sure to tag us @nicoleburnettmentalcoach and @resilientreiner on Instagram and share this episode with your community! I am curious to hear all about your experience. Also, be sure to leave a review on iTunes to help others discover the show.

In This Episode You Will Learn:

• How to get your horse to listen to you
• The hidden role your nervous system plays in dull, reactive, or bracey responses
• How fight, flight, or freeze shows up in your aids without you realizing it
• The cycle that creates escalating pressure between horse and rider
• Why responsiveness isn’t built through force, but clarity and timing
• What a regulated rider actually does differently in the saddle
• A simple pre-ride reset to improve communication instantly
• How eye softness, breath, and body quietness change your horse’s willingness
• The real “response” you’re training beyond physical cues
• Why nervous system training matters even more when you haul out or ride under pressure

Questions I Answer:

• Why does your horse’s response to your cues feel dull or delayed?
• Is your horse ignoring you — or are youI accidentally giving mixed signals?
• How does nervous system activation affect responsiveness?
• What does escalation from the rider feel like from the horse’s perspective?
• How can you improve timing without trying harder or using more pressure?
• What simple reset can you use before mounting or during sticky moments?
• How do top riders create horses that “hunt the cue”?
• What’s the difference between forceful responsiveness and willing responsiveness?
• Why does everything feel easier at home but fall apart in new environments?

Links & Resources:

• 🎯 5 Days to Confident Competitor
• Stop “show nerves” and saddle up with swagger.
• 👉 https://nicoleburnettcoaching.thrivecart.com/5-days-to-confident-competitor/
• 🎯 Mental Gym for Equestrians
• Train your mind like a pro so you ride like one.
• 👉 https://mentalgymforequestrians.com/
• 🎯 Free Weekly Mental Coaching Tips
• Get rider-specific mindset tools in your inbox. Join my email list here.
• 👉https://www.resilientreiner.com/