#204 You Have to Be Willing to Look Dumb. Kari Klingenberg on Growth, Discomfort, and Better Riding

Join me for a sit down with Kari Klingenberg—an NRHA Professional, Team USA representative, and reining trainer based at Pinnacle Ranch in Scottsdale, Arizona—who works with horses and riders at every level to build real performance in the show pen.

And we got real about what actually separates riders who show up like themselves when it counts…

from the ones who feel like everything falls apart the second the pressure hits.

We talk about what it really takes to build confidence as a rider, why some riders keep hitting the same wall (no matter how hard they work), and the shift that changes how your horse responds to you in real time.

Kari brings a grounded, no-BS perspective from the trainer’s side—developing horses, coaching non-pro riders, and navigating her own path in the western performance horse world.

And I think you’re going to feel seen in this one…

especially if you’ve ever walked out of the show pen thinking,

“I know I can ride better than that.”

If you or someone you know has benefited from this episode, be sure to tag us @nicoleburnettmentalcoach @resilientreiner and @kariannaph on Instagram and share this episode with your community! I am curious to hear all about your experience. Also, be sure to leave a review on iTunes to help others discover the show.

In This Episode You Will Learn:

• Why riding great at home but struggling in the show pen has nothing to do with your actual riding ability
• The real reason your horse feels different under pressure (and how you might be speaking a totally different “language” without realizing it)
• How present-moment focus unlocks your best rides—and why most riders never actually access it
• The difference between a rider who wants it… and a rider who is actually aligned with what it takes
• What “I can’t” is really doing to your riding—and how to shift into a growth mindset that actually creates progress
• Why discomfort, mistakes, and even looking dumb are part of becoming a better rider (and how to stop resisting that)
• The hidden pressure riders put on themselves—and how it shows up in their horse’s behavior
• How to stop over-checking your horse and start trusting your training
• The role identity plays in your confidence, your decisions, and your results in the saddle
• Why your goals might not be the problem… but your expectations around them are
• How to balance ambition with enjoyment so riding doesn’t feel like a constant test
• The truth about sacrifice in the western performance world—and why not everyone actually wants what they think they want
• How to build resilience when things don’t go your way in the show pen
• Why being “honest with yourself” is one of the most powerful tools you have as a rider

Questions I Answer:

• Why do you ride so well at home, but feel like you lose it at shows?
• How do you stay focused in the show pen instead of worrying about judges or other riders?
• What’s the difference between a training issue and a confidence issue?
• How do you know if your goals are realistic—or if you’re holding yourself back?
• Why does your horse feel different when you get nervous?
• How do you stop overthinking every cue and just ride?
• What should you do when you feel like you’re not improving fast enough?
• How can you push yourself without making every ride feel stressful?
• Why do you feel like you have to prove something every time you show?
• How do you rebuild confidence after a bad run or tough show?

Links & Resources:

• 🎯 5 Days to Confident Competitor
• Stop “show nerves” and saddle up with swagger.
• 👉 https://nicoleburnettcoaching.thrivecart.com/5-days-to-confident-competitor/
• 🎯 Mental Gym for Equestrians
• Train your mind like a pro so you ride like one.
• 👉 https://mentalgymforequestrians.com/
• 🎯 Free Weekly Mental Coaching Tips
• Get rider-specific mindset tools in your inbox. Join my email list here.
• 👉https://www.resilientreiner.com/